Saturday, March 31, 2012

Spring!!!

"Loving a free and feeling spirit
Hugging a tree when you get near it
Digging the snow and the rain and the bright sunshine"


Man, I had a good run today! My stupid garmin needed to be charged, so I had to go without it. I went during the boy's martial arts class and I was diggin' the sunshine! I don't actually have that song on my playlist, but it is what was going through my head during the run, so there ya go.

Anyways, according to the gmaps pedometer I did about 3.75 miles, and according to my interval timer it was in around 43:45, but those tools are not as good as my garmin. But the point is, it was a good run.

I did 2.5 on the tready yesterday at the hotel (traveling for work again) and I ran three miles on Tuesday and Wednesday in the morning, so overall I think a good week.

I need to do my long tomorrow and I'm not sure how long I am going to make it. I'm a bit behind on my training because I was sick last weekend, but it shouldn't be too hard to figure out.

Sunday, March 25, 2012

Five and Setback

Friday morning I woke up with a stomach virus that left me in bed for the next 24 hours alternately sweating, dry heaving and shivering and generally wishing someone would just knock me unconscious so I wouldn't have to feel the nausea any more. It was awful.

So, I didn't run.

I felt better enough by yesterday afternoon to ride my bike some and walk some, but that was about it.

Today I did five miles for my long, which should have really been six and a half. And it was ugly. 12:35/mile. But it got done, and I just hope it's not too much of a setback in my training, May 20th is coming sooner rather than later at this point.

Thursday, March 22, 2012

My Fitness Enemy

My Fitness Pal is making me a bit crazy. It has my goal as 1450 "net" calories a day, in order to lose one pound a week, and when you log your exercise there, it adds to your "net" calories, so you earn more calories.

This system is, quite frankly, not working for me and is making me a bit crazy. I really like their food database, though. It is easy to use and you can really and truly easily track your calories, which I really like and I have never found on any other calorie counting system (and I've used plenty).

But 1450 is simply not enough food for me, period end of story. And then I go over and it causes me to act in all kinds of dysfunctional ways with food. It also impacts my exercise, since exercise becomes not so much about feeling good and healthy but about earning more food, so I make unhealthy decisions, such as not resting on a day that I really should rest, because then I won't have enough calories. And, just to add icing to the crap cake, all of this is resulting in my not losing weight but gaining it! Huzzah!

So, I'm saying fuck all that shit. I changed my goal on the site to be 1800 calories per day and I'm just not going to log my exercise there at all. So, my goal is to stay within 1800 and presume that I will have a nice and slow weight loss (as usual), and stop with the whole connecting exercise to being rewarded with more food, because that is just garbage.

We'll see how it goes.

Monday, March 19, 2012

Start the day with a victory

In my desperate attempt to get a handle on my food intake, I've been making weekly food goals. They haven't been going well, so I decided I need to make them a bit smaller, more manageable as it were. So, this week's goal is to simply start each day off with some kind of victory. I have found that doing this really helps me out throughout the day, whether it is as simple as measuring out my coffee creamer (as opposed to just dumping in what I think is the right amount), or conquering nemesis hill on my morning run, it helps to start the day off with some kind of win.

As a family, I have also made the executive decision that there will be no more eating dinner in front of the tv or the computer (that's right, we are THAT family, the worst kind, the kind where the parents usually have enough energy to throw something together for dinner after work rather than going through a drive through, but not enough energy to force everyone to sit down at the table and eat it together and come up with stuff to talk about). It's really healthier for everyone and I did see the fruits of my back breaking labors when the boy asked if he could have seconds of something we were eating but if he could take the seconds to the living room and watch tv, and I said no, you can certainly have more food, but you have to eat it at the table and he goes "well, in that case, I'm done". I did let him have his sugar free pudding cup on his own, so sue me.

I'm also changing the boy to bag lunch instead of school lunch. I've decided they aren't feeding him well enough at that stupid school. When he and I talked about it last, I asked him about his choices, and he was telling me that often the vegetable on offer is raw broccoli, which he won't eat (and I don't blame him one single bit, I won't eat that crap either), and that sometimes the fruit that is offered isn't any good either (like, the apples are brown and not very crispy) or other times the fruit is canned peaches, which he will eat, but those aren't too healthy! Now, the boy will eat healthy food, but it has to be, you know, GOOD. He will gladly eat broccoli when it is cooked, as well as many other cooked vegetables and he will eat almost any fresh fruit except mushy apples, which is naturally the thing that school cafeterias love to serve. The other thing is that the "main dishes" that are served are most often some kind of cheese bread with sauce to dip it in, or some sort of breaded chicken chunk which they call healthy since it is "baked" not fried. It's just not ideal.

The girl, Chris and I are already all on bagged lunches, we rarely eat lunch out more than once a week, if that (the girl doesn't like to wait in the line for the cafeteria lunches and just prefers to bring her own), so it's just one more lunch for me to make. We'll see how it goes. The last time I tried this with the boy, he kept "forgetting" he had brought a lunch and would eat the school lunch and then the lunch I made would either go to waste or be eaten after school, and that defies the whole point of the thing. But this time, I drained the money in his lunch account, so hopefully that will help him remember.

Anyways, just another day in the fight...

Sunday, March 18, 2012

I'm totally getting a basket on this thing, y'all

So, I've been saying for a while that I wanted a bike, but every time I sort of looked into it, the whole thing looked really complicated and expensive. But the other day, one of my friends at work told me they "went to WalMart and picked up a bike" for her, and I had kind of a revelation... I didn't have to get an expensive or complicated bike, I could just go to WalMart and pick one up! So I did! And it wasn't too expensive at all! Here is my bike, in all its awesomeness.



And here is me, riding it around my neighborhood, making quite a scene. I was kind of worried I wouldn't remember how to ride a bike, but it turns out the old saying is true, you never forget. Although Chris was concerned enough about the prospect to make my buy a helmet and actually wear it, even though I really didn't want to.


Six

For the long. And it went very well! 1:11:32, 11:55/mile. Did 3R/1W intervals. I've been doing 4R intervals on my short runs and that is going very well.

Eating is going not so well. Not so well at all. The sugar monster has had me firmly in its clutches in recent days/weeks. I keep trying, though.

Sunday, March 11, 2012

Windy PR

Yesterday I did my long, a respectable 5.5 miles at a respectable time of 12:05/mile.

Today I set out to do three miles, and I was doing so well (4R intervals) that I decided to make it a 5K and see if I couldn't go ahead and meet my 2012 goal of a sub 35 minute 5K today. Alas, I did not quite make it, although I did set a new PR, so that's pretty good. Time was 35:29, so I just need to be a little bit faster to reach my time goal on the 5K. I think if I can get my intervals up to 5R/1W I can probably do it. And this was my neighborhood course, if you will, lots of hills including nemesis hill, which beat me today, I ended up walking for thirty seconds that I should have been running.

I've been trying to run through one walk interval on my runs these days, and I did do it both days this weekend, so that is also a pretty nice accomplishment.


Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Chasing Rabbits

I got out early this morning. It was 27 degrees here, so just on the edge of what I am willing to do outside. It never got warmer while I was running. I was up early enough to get to the gym, but I knew that if I did that I would just spend the whole time staring out the windows and telling myself that I could have and should have gone outside.

Anyways, I did 4R/1W intervals today, for three miles and it went well. I knew that nemesis hill would be a problem at these intervals, so I did some proactive stuff just before getting to it like picking out the best song and consciously telling myself to go ahead and breathe like a steam train (sometimes I have to really remind myself of this because I will find myself trying to limit my breathing out of self consciousness or insecurity). And I did it and when I topped the hill I was all "Ha, take that nemesis hill, you won't beat me today!" My time was not super fast, but I have noticed that when I increase intervals, it does not reflect on my time right away (leading to discouraging thoughts about why the hell I am trying so hard), but if I just keep at it, it starts to lead to faster times, it just doesn't happen right away.

So, it was a pretty good run. I was chasing rabbits, who don't seem to be able to get out of my way quickly which surprises me, I mean this is a 188 pound woman coming at you breathing like a steam train, not some swift coyote. But I like seeing them, they remind me that Spring is almost here.

Monday, March 5, 2012

No reason in particular to blog

I continue to struggle weight-wise and food-wise. I'm reading a book right now called "The End of Overeating" which is interesting in a science-y kind of way. I could use more restriction in the band, and I think I will go to the doc next week and get another fill.

In the meantime, I'm surprised I haven't blown up, but I'm guessing the exercise is keeping most of the weight gain in check, although I certainly have gained a little from my lowest point. I started recording weekly food goals in my exercise log, along with a treadmill goal and/or running goal.

This week my goal is a pretty simple one of no junk food. I am working on a visualization technique to try and stop the cues from turning into actions (that's from the book, although the visualization technique is one I made up).

Treadmill goal is just one mile at 1 percent incline and all miles at a minimum of 12:20/mile pace.

Saturday, March 3, 2012

A Case of Low Expectations

You know the scenario... it is windy and cold. You can't get started on the run until pretty late in the afternoon due to other weekend commitments. You spend more time than is necessary picking out what to wear for the run (although the weather is tricky), and generally bitching and moaning about how bad it is all going to be. The only thing that gets you out is the shame and loserishness you will feel if you don't. You resolve to go slow.

You get to the trail and start running. Two minutes in, you realize it is not going to be as bad as you thought. Ten minutes in you realize you are having one of the best runs ever! Your form feels perfect, your feet pounding the ground feels like the most natural thing in the world. The wind is at your back (for now) and you are able to keep the pace you want easily. Your breathing settles in like a miracle and the horses that have chosen to graze near the path feel like a gift from the Great Mother, put there just for you to remind you that the core of all things truly beautiful is strength. *

On the way to the other weekend commitment we had, I was telling Chris how I hate running and I don't know why I keep doing it. He goes "well, what would happen if you stopped" and I said I didn't know. I just didn't think I would feel good, I would be depressed.

But during this run, I realized that this run is why I run. Because even though you have to suffer through some awful times and go when you don't want to, and run in the cold and the wind, when running is good, it is just that good, good enough to make everything else worth it.

So, you keep running, just hoping this one is going to be good.






*I feel I should note that all these fantastic things only applied to the first four miles of this run. The last mile did nothing but suck balls.