A day or two after watching this, I was helping Chris look for some medical records, and I came across these pictures. I remembered the setting (we were camping, hence the deplorable state of my hair and generally unkempt condition) and after some searching around on my computer, I was able to date them to early September of 2006.
I found this one while I was getting ready to publish this post, this is from when I went to Boston in 2008.
In these pictures, I was probably at my highest weight. I have to guess at that, since I don't actually remember what the scale said back then, but that shirt I am wearing I believe was a 3X, and even though it was baggy, it wasn't that baggy. I was probably somewhere around 275 in these pictures (the scale this morning says I am now at 187). I had lost around 60 pounds back in 2004, but by this time had gained it all back.
Anyways, so I found these pictures and I realized how true it is what those people in the documentary were saying. Because this is still ME. I look at those pictures and I don't feel disgust or any other negativity like "thank god I'm not there anymore" because most of the time in my head, I still AM. All I feel is a kind of familiarity, like "oh, yeah, I remember that shirt, I remember that trip" but seeing how much bigger I was is more of a startling thing than anything else. Because that girl is still with me. She's with me on every run, on every walk and bike ride. She's with me on good food days and bad food days and every other day in between.
I don't actually have anything particularly profound to say about it, but I thought I would share it anyway.
And since everyone loves an "after", here ya go:
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